Berusahalah untuk berbahagia karena kebahagiaan itu sesungguhnya bisa diusahakan.
Jangan mundur hanya karena masalah datang. Jangan hancur hanya karena masalah datang.
Awali dengan tersenyum. Buka hati. Ingatlah betapa banyak hal yang sudah Engkau peroleh. Bersyukurlah.. Bersyukurlah.. Niscaya Engkau bahagia.
20 May 2009
How to Be More Patient
1. Remember what written on Alquran. Allah SWT comes along with those who have patient.
2. Tally marks. If you have real problems with patience: start by simply keeping tally marks on a little sheet of paper every time you lose your patience. This is one of the most effective and important methods for controlling an impulse — by learning to become more aware of it. Once you become aware of your impulses, you can work out an alternative reaction.
3. Figure out your triggers. As you become more aware of losing your patience, pay close attention to the things that trigger you to lose that patience. Is it when your co-worker does something particularly irritating? When your spouse leaves dirty dishes in the sink? When your child doesn’t clean up her mess? Certain triggers will recur more frequently than others — these are the things you should focus on the most.
4. Deep breaths. When you first start to lose your patience, take a deep breath, and breathe out slowly. Then take another. And another. These three breaths will often do the trick, as your frustration will slowly melt away.
5. Count to 10. This one really works. When you feel yourself getting frustrated or angry, stop. Count slowly to 10 (you can do this in your head). When you’re done, most of the initial impulse to yell or do something out of frustation will go away. Combine this with the breathing tip for even more effectiveness.
6. Take a time out. Often it’s best just to walk away for a few minutes. Take a break from the situation, just for 5-10 minutes, let yourself calm down, plan out your words and actions and solution, and then come back calm as a monk.
7. Remember what’s important. Sometimes we tend to get upset over little things. In the long run, these things tend not to matter, but in the heat of the moment, we might forget this. Stop yourself, and try to get things in perspective.
8. Visualize. This works best if you do it before the frustrating situation comes up. When you’re alone and in a quiet place. Visualize how you want to react the next time your trigger happens. How do you handle the situation? How do you look? What do you say? How does the other person react? How does it help your relationship, your life? Think about all these things, visualize the perfect situation, and then try to actually make that happen when the situation actually comes up.
9. Remember that things can take time. Nothing good happens right away. If you expect things to happen at the snap of your fingers, you’ll get impatient every time. Instead, realize that things will take time, and this realization can help your patience tremendously.
10. Teach. This is something that helps me a lot. I remember that no one is perfect, and that everyone has a lot to learn. Be patient, and teach others how to do things — even if you’ve tried before, it might be the 11th time when things click. And remember, none of us learn things on the first try. Find new ways to teach something, and you’re more likely to be successful.
11. Find healthy ways to relieve frustration. Frustration can build up like steam in a pressure cooker, and if you don’t relieve that steam, you’ll explode. So find ways to relieve that frustration in a healthy way. Punching a pillow, going outside to a place where you’re all alone and yelling, exercise, these are just a few examples. Once you get that frustration out of your system, you usually feel better.
12. Try meditation. You can’t meditate in the middle of a frustrating situation, usually, but often meditation can help you to learn to find a center of calm within yourself. Once you learn how to go to this calm place, you can go there when you begin to get angry. Meditation can also help you to be in the moment, instead of always wanting to get to the future, or instead of dwelling on the past and getting angry about it.
13. Just laugh. Sometimes we need to remind ourselves that no one is perfect, that we should be enjoying this time with our loved ones, and that life should be fun — and funny. Smile, laugh, be happy. Doesn’t always work, but it’s good to remind yourself of this now and then.
14. Just love. Instead of reacting with anger, teach yourself to react with love. Your child spills something or has a messy room or breaks your family heirloom? Your spouse yells at you or is cranky after work? React with love. It’s the best solution.
15. Start small. Don’t try to become as patient as Job overnight. It won’t happen. Start with something small and manageable. Look for a trigger that only induces a mild impatience within you — not something that gets your blood boiling. Then focus on this, and forget the other triggers for now. Work on controlling your temper for that one trigger. If you can get this one under control, use what you learned to focus on the next small trigger. One at a time, and with practice, you’ll get there.
16. Keep practicing. Every time a situation stretches your patience to dangerous thinness, just think of it as an opportunity to practice your patience. Because that’s what it take to become patient — practice, practice, more practice, and even more practice. And then some more. And the more you practice, the better you’ll get. So cherish these wonderful opportunities to practice.
2. Tally marks. If you have real problems with patience: start by simply keeping tally marks on a little sheet of paper every time you lose your patience. This is one of the most effective and important methods for controlling an impulse — by learning to become more aware of it. Once you become aware of your impulses, you can work out an alternative reaction.
3. Figure out your triggers. As you become more aware of losing your patience, pay close attention to the things that trigger you to lose that patience. Is it when your co-worker does something particularly irritating? When your spouse leaves dirty dishes in the sink? When your child doesn’t clean up her mess? Certain triggers will recur more frequently than others — these are the things you should focus on the most.
4. Deep breaths. When you first start to lose your patience, take a deep breath, and breathe out slowly. Then take another. And another. These three breaths will often do the trick, as your frustration will slowly melt away.
5. Count to 10. This one really works. When you feel yourself getting frustrated or angry, stop. Count slowly to 10 (you can do this in your head). When you’re done, most of the initial impulse to yell or do something out of frustation will go away. Combine this with the breathing tip for even more effectiveness.
6. Take a time out. Often it’s best just to walk away for a few minutes. Take a break from the situation, just for 5-10 minutes, let yourself calm down, plan out your words and actions and solution, and then come back calm as a monk.
7. Remember what’s important. Sometimes we tend to get upset over little things. In the long run, these things tend not to matter, but in the heat of the moment, we might forget this. Stop yourself, and try to get things in perspective.
8. Visualize. This works best if you do it before the frustrating situation comes up. When you’re alone and in a quiet place. Visualize how you want to react the next time your trigger happens. How do you handle the situation? How do you look? What do you say? How does the other person react? How does it help your relationship, your life? Think about all these things, visualize the perfect situation, and then try to actually make that happen when the situation actually comes up.
9. Remember that things can take time. Nothing good happens right away. If you expect things to happen at the snap of your fingers, you’ll get impatient every time. Instead, realize that things will take time, and this realization can help your patience tremendously.
10. Teach. This is something that helps me a lot. I remember that no one is perfect, and that everyone has a lot to learn. Be patient, and teach others how to do things — even if you’ve tried before, it might be the 11th time when things click. And remember, none of us learn things on the first try. Find new ways to teach something, and you’re more likely to be successful.
11. Find healthy ways to relieve frustration. Frustration can build up like steam in a pressure cooker, and if you don’t relieve that steam, you’ll explode. So find ways to relieve that frustration in a healthy way. Punching a pillow, going outside to a place where you’re all alone and yelling, exercise, these are just a few examples. Once you get that frustration out of your system, you usually feel better.
12. Try meditation. You can’t meditate in the middle of a frustrating situation, usually, but often meditation can help you to learn to find a center of calm within yourself. Once you learn how to go to this calm place, you can go there when you begin to get angry. Meditation can also help you to be in the moment, instead of always wanting to get to the future, or instead of dwelling on the past and getting angry about it.
13. Just laugh. Sometimes we need to remind ourselves that no one is perfect, that we should be enjoying this time with our loved ones, and that life should be fun — and funny. Smile, laugh, be happy. Doesn’t always work, but it’s good to remind yourself of this now and then.
14. Just love. Instead of reacting with anger, teach yourself to react with love. Your child spills something or has a messy room or breaks your family heirloom? Your spouse yells at you or is cranky after work? React with love. It’s the best solution.
15. Start small. Don’t try to become as patient as Job overnight. It won’t happen. Start with something small and manageable. Look for a trigger that only induces a mild impatience within you — not something that gets your blood boiling. Then focus on this, and forget the other triggers for now. Work on controlling your temper for that one trigger. If you can get this one under control, use what you learned to focus on the next small trigger. One at a time, and with practice, you’ll get there.
16. Keep practicing. Every time a situation stretches your patience to dangerous thinness, just think of it as an opportunity to practice your patience. Because that’s what it take to become patient — practice, practice, more practice, and even more practice. And then some more. And the more you practice, the better you’ll get. So cherish these wonderful opportunities to practice.
How to Sleep Well
Try one or two or a combination until you have enough quality sleep to feel alert and well rested.
1. Don't eat or drink a lot before bedtime. Eat a light dinner about 2 hours before sleeping. If you drink too much liquid before sleeping, you'll wake up repeatedly in the night for trips to the bathroom.
Don't eat spicy or fatty foods. They cause heartburn.
Don't have a midnight snack. If you get the munchies, eat something that triggers serotonin, which makes you sleepy. Carbohydrates (bread or cereal) or foods containing the amino acid L-tryptophan (milk, tuna, or turkey) will do the trick.
Don't drink alcohol near bedtime. It may cause you to wake up repeatedly, snore and possibly develop sleep apnea.
2. Avoid caffeine and nicotine. They are addictive stimulants and keep you awake. Smokers experience withdrawal symptoms at night, and they have a harder time both falling asleep and waking up.
3. Stick to a schedule, and don't sleep late on weekends. If you sleep late on Saturday and Sunday morning, you'll get Sunday night insomnia. Instead, go to bed and get up at about the same time every day.
4. Exercise. If you're trying to sleep better, the best time to exercise is in the afternoon. Physical activity enhances the deep, refreshing stage of sleep.
5. A slightly cool room is ideal for sleeping. This mimics your internal temperature drop during sleep, so turn off the heat and save on fuel bills.
If you tend to get cold, use blankets. Try sleeping in warmer nightclothes and wear socks. Studies show that warm hands and feet induce sleep quickly.
If you overheat at night, wear light nightclothes and sleep under a single sheet. Use an air conditioner or fan to keep the room cool.
Use a dehumidifier if you are bothered by moist air. Use a humidifier if you are bothered by dry air. Signs of dry air irritation include a sore throat, nosebleeds or a dry throat.
6. Sleep only at night. Daytime naps steal hours from nighttime slumber. Limit daytime sleep to 20-minute, power naps.
If you work nights, keep window coverings closed so that sunlight, which interferes with the body's internal clock, doesn't interrupt your sleep.
If you have a day job and sleep at night, but still have trouble waking, leave the window covering open and let the sun's light wake you up.
7. Keep it quiet. Silence is more conducive to sleep. Turn off the radio and TV. Use earplugs, a fan or some other source of constant, soothing, background noise to mask sound that you cannot control, such as a busy street, trains, airplanes or even a snoring partner. Double-pane windows and heavy curtains also muffle outside noise.
8. Make your bed. "A good bed is subjective and different for each person. Make sure you have a bed that is comfortable and offers orthopedic, correct sleep," says Dr. Shepard.
If you share your bed, make sure there is enough room for two.
Use your bed only for sleep and sex.
Go to bed when you are tired and turn out the lights. If you don't fall asleep in 15 minutes, get up and do something else. Go back to bed when you are tired.
Do not agonize about falling asleep. The stress will only prevent sleep.
9. Soak and sack out. Taking a hot shower or bath before bed helps bring on sleep because they can relax the tense muscles.
10. Don't rely on sleeping pills. Check with your doctor before using sleeping pills. Make sure the pills won't interact with other medications or with an existing medical condition.
Use the lowest dosage and never mix alcohol and sleeping pills.
If you feel sleepy or dizzy during the day, talk to your doctor about changing the dosage or discontinuing the pills.
A great way to sleep well is definitely making sure you have the right mattress for you. More and more people are turning to memory foam mattresses to achieve a more restful night's sleep. With a memory foam mattress that molds to the shape of your body you are sure to receive a full night of sleep and see what it truly means to have a good night.
1. Don't eat or drink a lot before bedtime. Eat a light dinner about 2 hours before sleeping. If you drink too much liquid before sleeping, you'll wake up repeatedly in the night for trips to the bathroom.
Don't eat spicy or fatty foods. They cause heartburn.
Don't have a midnight snack. If you get the munchies, eat something that triggers serotonin, which makes you sleepy. Carbohydrates (bread or cereal) or foods containing the amino acid L-tryptophan (milk, tuna, or turkey) will do the trick.
Don't drink alcohol near bedtime. It may cause you to wake up repeatedly, snore and possibly develop sleep apnea.
2. Avoid caffeine and nicotine. They are addictive stimulants and keep you awake. Smokers experience withdrawal symptoms at night, and they have a harder time both falling asleep and waking up.
3. Stick to a schedule, and don't sleep late on weekends. If you sleep late on Saturday and Sunday morning, you'll get Sunday night insomnia. Instead, go to bed and get up at about the same time every day.
4. Exercise. If you're trying to sleep better, the best time to exercise is in the afternoon. Physical activity enhances the deep, refreshing stage of sleep.
5. A slightly cool room is ideal for sleeping. This mimics your internal temperature drop during sleep, so turn off the heat and save on fuel bills.
If you tend to get cold, use blankets. Try sleeping in warmer nightclothes and wear socks. Studies show that warm hands and feet induce sleep quickly.
If you overheat at night, wear light nightclothes and sleep under a single sheet. Use an air conditioner or fan to keep the room cool.
Use a dehumidifier if you are bothered by moist air. Use a humidifier if you are bothered by dry air. Signs of dry air irritation include a sore throat, nosebleeds or a dry throat.
6. Sleep only at night. Daytime naps steal hours from nighttime slumber. Limit daytime sleep to 20-minute, power naps.
If you work nights, keep window coverings closed so that sunlight, which interferes with the body's internal clock, doesn't interrupt your sleep.
If you have a day job and sleep at night, but still have trouble waking, leave the window covering open and let the sun's light wake you up.
7. Keep it quiet. Silence is more conducive to sleep. Turn off the radio and TV. Use earplugs, a fan or some other source of constant, soothing, background noise to mask sound that you cannot control, such as a busy street, trains, airplanes or even a snoring partner. Double-pane windows and heavy curtains also muffle outside noise.
8. Make your bed. "A good bed is subjective and different for each person. Make sure you have a bed that is comfortable and offers orthopedic, correct sleep," says Dr. Shepard.
If you share your bed, make sure there is enough room for two.
Use your bed only for sleep and sex.
Go to bed when you are tired and turn out the lights. If you don't fall asleep in 15 minutes, get up and do something else. Go back to bed when you are tired.
Do not agonize about falling asleep. The stress will only prevent sleep.
9. Soak and sack out. Taking a hot shower or bath before bed helps bring on sleep because they can relax the tense muscles.
10. Don't rely on sleeping pills. Check with your doctor before using sleeping pills. Make sure the pills won't interact with other medications or with an existing medical condition.
Use the lowest dosage and never mix alcohol and sleeping pills.
If you feel sleepy or dizzy during the day, talk to your doctor about changing the dosage or discontinuing the pills.
A great way to sleep well is definitely making sure you have the right mattress for you. More and more people are turning to memory foam mattresses to achieve a more restful night's sleep. With a memory foam mattress that molds to the shape of your body you are sure to receive a full night of sleep and see what it truly means to have a good night.
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